1. A person deserves to be your lover only if the person is saying I am not going to become your goal. I am not going to become your objective. I will only become a fellow traveller, a means, a bridge. If you come to me then I will take you beyond me. I will not make you stay with me. I will not possess you. I will not make you stop at me. Instead, I will guide you beyond me. That is how the wise man decides on his lover, if it all it can be called a decision. Because in such matters, what happens is so spontaneous that it cannot really be called a decision. But what Kabir is enunciating to us is the basis of spontaneity. That basis is ‘The Beyond’.
Please understand this carefully once again. If you come across something or somebody that attracts you to itself, then that thing is in fact dangerous for you, because it will completely envelope you, encircle you, and in that way enslave you. It will say you can move no further , your journey ends here, there at me. You are my husband now and go no further. You are my son, look no further. The real lover will say: because I love you, I’ll help you go Beyond. Maybe we will travel together to the Beyond.
2. The lover does not say: “You are travelling at a particular speed, I’ll enable you to move faster”. The lover says: “No more movement. I blocked the road now. Go no beyond.” And if you go beyond me then I will call it immoral. I will say that you have breached the code of loyalty. For that is what my definition of Love is, the Lover would say. The deluded lover would say that my definition of love is that you have to be devoted, dedicated and loyal to ‘me’.
The Real lover would say: “Forget me! Do not remember me. Because if you remember me, then you are not remembering the Truth. Forget me so that you may remember the Truth. It is not me who matters, something else matters.”
3. Whenever you have been attracted to something, you have been attracted to the Ultimate.
That something is auspicious for you only if that something takes you to the Ultimate.
4. We never look at our lovers that way; in fact, it would be so unromantic, right? If the lover looks like a Guru, acts like a Guru, even remotely resembles a Guru, that would be disqualification enough for you to reject him or her.
‘You should look hot and sensual baby! What is all this Guru business? Not in front of me, maybe in front of your audiences. Don’t try this act in our intimacy, it is just suppose to be a public show. All that preaching and Satsang. What is that? That is just a performance, right! A public performance, for consumption of gullible fools who are prepared to be taken in. But here, our relationship, this is real, this is intimate, this is personal between you and me and here we have to talk of the sweet and nice things of life. Not other worldly and boring stuff like Truth and Freedom. Let’s talk of perfumes, let’s talk of fairies, let’s talk of various pleasures that our bodies can give us. What is this nonsense about divinity and immortality! What is this thing called the ultimate? Let me show you the ultimate! And I promise you that all your desires will be extinguished.’
If the lover has nothing to do with the Truth, your lover can have nothing to do with you either. If your lover could not be devoted to the One, to the Father, are you a fool to think that he or she can be devoted to you? Who are you? What is your worth? The one who has supreme worth, your so called lover, could not be loyal even to Him. How is this fellow going to be loyal to you?
5. The Guru is the lover, the lover is the Guru, and there can be no distinction between the two.
This challenges our images.
The lover is imagined to be active, attractive.
A Guru is imagined to be staid, passive, wise, but hardly attractive in the worldly sense, that is.
No, these two definitions must converge, and they can converge only if both of them dissolve.
6. Spirituality is not about the elimination of pain and pleasure. It is about being comfortable with both of them.
7. Your Wish shall be granted against your wish.
8. When you are alright, then the sound of your footsteps is compassion.
9. What is a right action?
A right action is that which comes from actually nowhere.
And therefore, it is fresh.
And therefore it does not need the assistance of past.
10. The really good comes to you from very unknown place. It does not come because you called it. It does not come because you drafted it. It does not come because you had anything to do with it.
The really good, the right action, meeting the wise one, entering the True – that happens on its own.
On its own, and is prepared to happen all the time, provided – you do not become an authority on your own; provided – you do not become the judge; provided – you do not become the decision–maker and the actor.
11. Because you have been surrendered, because you have been moving as one with existence, only the right things will happen through you.
You won’t even have to try to be an agent of change.
Your very presence will cause the right change all around you.
12. When you are not bothered about the other, that is when you are totally compassionate. When you are not trying to change the other, that is when you become an agent of change.
13. You are a Lao Tzu when you don’t have a Lao Tzu as your ideal.
14. All the literature that we study, spirituality, this and that, that is useless without an observation of our daily life.
And daily life is right now, nowhere else.
15. You may have Lao Tzu as an ideal.
Whom did Lao Tzu have as an ideal?
We have Lao Tzu as an ideal and yet we are nowhere close to Lao Tzu, are we?
Lao Tzu had no Lao Tzu as ideal, and yet he was Lao Tzu.
16. You are a Lao Tzu when you don’t have a Lao Tzu as your ideal.
You are a Lao Tzu when you know nothing about Lao Tzu.
17. Real understanding is a state of your mind in which it is attentive.
That intelligent self; it knows.
That is real understanding.
18. The mind is very, very angry.
The mind is ticking like a time bomb, but you are not at all angry.
Now the mind is angry, so it’s showing up on the face, but then there is a point within you that is not angry.
Just a small point and that is the Real you.
That small point is Real you.
Everything else is mind.
19. Before you understand others, silence your mind.
20. It is surely possible to understand the happening, but for that you have to be silent.
21. Be silent and come close.
If you want to know something, come close to it.
By being away from it, you will not be able to know.
To be disturbed is to be away from the present.
22. To be disturbed is to not to be in the present.
And when you are not in the present, when you are not close to the present, how will you read the present?
24. When you are still, then the mind will be able to see what’s going on.
25. Give yourself an environment, free of disturbances.
As an intelligent individual, identify your disturbances and keep them a little away.
Then you have fun.
This is what am calling as party of life.
The grand carnival of life.
26. When one knows only the external, then one lives only for the sake of the external.
27. Clarity is two things together: One, it is the absence of readymade concepts based on which one lives, one reacts, one sees the world, and parallelly, simultaneously, on the other hand, it is the ability to respond greatly.
28. When you have no ammunition with which to face life, then you have a lot of love with which to greet life.
29. Clarity is an emptiness in one way; emptiness in the sense that you are empty of all rubbish, and on the other hand, this emptiness is a great fullness. These two, hence, must be called as two but understood as one.
30. Free of knowledge, now you are full of knowing — that is clarity.
31. Clarity means, the ability to stand naked in front of life.
32. Clarity is like going to life like a lover – naked!
Not like a warrior.
Not like a fighter.
Like a lover.
33. If you are not afraid then you can just present yourself empty handed, naked, without preparation, without defences, without armours, without weapons and clothing.
Here I am, naked!
Not the warrior, but the lover.
34. That point from where the response comes, without preparation, without past, without motive, without memory — that is clarity.
35. To know yourself, firstly stop believing that you know anything about yourself.
36. A solution cannot come from the same mind that experiences a problem.
37. Know the real man as much by his scars as by his smiles.
38. When you can see your entire universe in the parted lips of the beloved, it is Aatman.
39. In true Love, you forget the lover.
40. Forget enlightenment.
Be human first.
41. Is one to empty himself out,
or fill himself up?
In the ocean, be full of the ocean.
In the sky, be empty as the sky.
42. Man can never forgive God.
43. When I am with you, I realise all is not, I am not, and you are not.
With you, all realisations end.
Only you show how false you are.
44. How to free the mind from disturbances?
What a disturbing question!
45. I cannot tell how to do it.
But I can surely tell how not to do it.
And when you forget how to do it, you also forget your need to do it.
46. What’s the fun in having followers?
I want you to see that you are the Guru.
47. Suffering is resistance to pain.
Satisfaction is acceptance of pleasure.
Suffering-satisfaction, resistance-acceptance, go together.
48. Non-resistance is to neither resist nor accept.
Non-resistance is freedom from the one who differentiates, chooses, resists, accepts.
49. Knowing dissolved the knower.
Knowing dissolved the knowledge.
Now what to know?
Now who would know?
Know not. You know.