A marriage, a relationship can never be between two persons

A marriage, a relationship can never be between two persons. Never. Whenever it is a person that is attracted to another person, the fate of the relationship will be the fate of the person.

What is the fate of the person? Are you the same person that you were ten years back? Are you the same person that you were five years back? Are you the same person that you were two years back? Are you the same person you were a year back? Are you the same person you were even a moment back?

If the relationship is person to person then the relationship will die the death of a person — for the person is dying every moment. Person is so ephemeral, so transitory, so fickle — he doesn’t last. A person is the moods. A person is the tendencies. A person is the fleeting thoughts and emotions. The relationship may — just formally, just superficially — continue in time, but it would just be a drag. If the person, if the mind gets attracted to something, then that attraction would pass away as quickly as that particular state of mind passes away. And we very well know that states of mind come only to pass away. Or, after that, you may formally, socially, legally still maintain the relationship, but that relationship would have no life.

Why does one get attracted to the other?
One gets attracted to the other just as one gets attracted to anything.

Why does desire arise? Why does that pull, that attraction happen?

Behind every desire is the desire to be fulfilled. That is our permanent love affair—the mind seeking fulfilment.

What does that mean? Does that mean that as a person there is no possibility of having a relationship with another person? If the only right, proper and truthful relationship can be with peace, with fulfilment, does that mean that there is no possibility of having a relationship with a physical person? No, obviously not. Not directly. What if there is a person who helps you move towards your own center? What if there is a person who is moving towards his own center? And remember, that fulfilment, the center, is a common center for all.

Being in contact with this person becomes a way to come to your own center. Remember, the person is not important, your center, your fulfilment is important. You are still moving towards that direction where you must reach—your own center. This person is helping you reach there. Your relationship with that person is not direct, not primary. Your primary relationship is with the center, the peace, the fulfilment—God. That is the first relationship. But this person is helping to accelerate or catalyse that relationship.

Now an indirect relationship will be there. But that relationship is not person to person. You will not say that I am interested in you—the man or the woman. You will say, “I am interested in the Truth, God, and you are wonderful because you help me reach there. I am interested in going to my center. I am interested in finding peace, and you are wonderful because you help me find that. You are wonderful only because you help me find that; for no other reason. Remember, for no other reason. The primary importance is the Truth itself.

Two persons can be unified with each other only if they are first unified with God.

And hence, every real relationship is a triangle – Center and these two.

These two moving towards the center and that is why the poem says, “You, Me and God living together in that tiny room.” And the room keeps on getting tinier, tinier, tinier, tinier; tinier and ultimately the room vanishes. The room vanishes because all three are One. Compressed into one. Gone, finished, dissolved. God loving God.

No you,

no I,

no God,

Just God.


Further Reading:

The Flying Kiss to the Sky

cover_fksA Flying Kiss to The Sky, is a collection of excerpts from various discourses of Acharya Prashant, arranged in a special order which makes it the ideal first book, for all who want to come close to the facts of their own lives.

The book is divided into three parts, each part helping the reader to appreciate the working of his own mind and hence, the world in more clear and precise terms. Its unique one-page-one-chapter format, makes it even more simpler. It won’t be wrong to say that it is a book for all: Reader, or non-reader; Professional, or Spiritual.

Paperback: Advait Publications Page

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