Relationship

  • “Expectation — the disease of relationships”

 

  • “Free from lovers, you become free to love”

 

  • “Need cannot be the basis of any relationship, including a leader-follower relationship. Any relationship cannot be based on need, because when you need something from somebody then you will not let that person free.The basis of relationship has to be once own fullness. “I am so complete in myself that I am not begging something from you, I have come here to give. This is what love is. Two people who are perfectly alright in there aloneness, when they get together. That is a healthy and beautiful relationship. They do not need each other, yet they are with each other.“We do not need each other, yet we are with each other, in our freedom”. That is a healthy relationship.”

 

  • “The more clearly you state to me that such and such people are inhibiting your freedom, hampering your growth, stealing your joy, the more obliged you become to answer the question then, “Why are you with them”?I will tell you, why are you with them.Because you are so corrupted that you want all the benefits that come from their company and parallelly you also want to insult and humiliate them. You take all that can be taken from them and then you sing to the world that they are exploiting you. Who is exploiting whom?”

 

  • “If time can change it, it is not the Truth. Is there anything in my life, relationships, beliefs, that does not come and go with time?”

 

  • “You are your relationships.”

 

  • “A relationship born out of loneliness will cause suffering to you and the other.”

 

  • “Different minds can connect to each other only via their common Center. For a loving relation with others, first connect to your own Center.”

 

  • “Man is the only creature in existence whose defining characteristic is his deep fear. Fear in his relationships, his goals, fear in his laughter, his love, his living, his progress, fear in his entire being.”

 

  • “Our relationships- a tale of spiritual bankruptcy.”

 

  • “Without an essential spiritual dimension to the relationship, an element of fear, suspicion and exploitation will always be there in it.”

 

  • “Find an absence of love, understanding and peace in your relationships? Its only because your relationships are devoid of a spiritual base.”

 

  • “Awareness is a part of life, meditation is a part of routine, love is a part of relationships. Sure, just as waking up is a part of the dream.”

 

  • “Leela and Maya: Maya is when one acts in the mistaken belief that the expression is the Essence. Leela happens when one knows essence as essence and expression as expression. When the world takes control of me, it is maya. When I am not ruled by world while still participating in it, it is Leela, and that is the only healthy relationship with world.”

 

  • “Is it not there? Or, is it not there for you? How you look- in the form of things, personalities of people, names of relations! Not there,really?”

 

  • “Rapes don’t just happen. They come out of the way we live daily. The company we keep, the jobs we do, our entertainment, our relationships.”

 

  • “Relationship of ignorance is not love.”

 

  • “My relationship with the world is my relationship with myself. Outer conflict is inner. One who fights his mind quarrels with the world.”

 

  • “Relationships are not ‘give and take’.”

 

  • “What do we try to save? Stuff of mind like respectability, relations, future. For the imaginary stuff, we lose the real.”

 

  • “If time can change it, it is not the Truth. Is there anything in my life, relationships, beliefs, that does not come and go with time?”

 

  • “When you have no real relationship with your work, which is you, and hence you do not have any relationship with yourself then all your life you are just seeking holidays.”

 

  • “A relationship based on emotions is a relationship based on ego.”

 

  • “Emotional relationship will prevent you from changing; an emotional relationship can never be the agent of change.”

 

  • “When the person changes, his relationships too must change.”

 

  • “The only relationship that one can hence truthfully have is the direct relationship with God.

    Any other relationship would be tangential, wavered.”

 

  • “Two persons can be unified with each other only if they are first unified with God.

    And hence, every real relationship is a triangle – Center and these two.”

 

  • “Marry God – that is the only right relationship.Be wedded to God.Be fully committed to the Truth.”

 

  • “When somebody who is attached to you via the body, sees, that the command of the body is no more being followed by you and by the other person, then all of a sudden he realizes the tremendous power of Truth. He sees — that there might be an entire past of many decades connecting me to this person yet when the Truth shines then past has no meaning.

    Your relationship might be of sixty years, but one moment of Truth, one glimpse of Truth obliterates all those sixty years. In the language of morality, this sounds like being disloyal, does it not?  “That one moment of some god-damn realization and you forgot our age-old real relationship! Is this your fidelity? Is this what our relationship means to you? So cheap!” Tell them — “yes”. One moment of Truth is bigger than sixty-years of any relationship or sixty-thousand years.”

 

  • “The one who is devoted to the Real Father is likely to have a loving relationship with the physical father also. But if you ignore the Real Father then the father on earth is of no use, no value.

    Be devoted to the Real one, the rest will follow. All your other relationships will then be Real and loving.

    The first has to come first. It cannot be supplanted.”

 

  • “Those who are free of the world, are free to relate with the world in a healthy way.
    And those who are dominated by the world, have no real relationship with the world.”

 

  • “Only the man free of others can have loving relationship with the others.”

 

  • “You rest within yourself, and the rest will be taken care of.
    That is the secret of Joyful relationships.
    Forget everything about relationships, and your relationships will really blossom.”

 

  • “The relationship is not so much about the other person – the object out there.
    The relationship is about who you are within.
    Change the within, the relationship will change.
    But remaining the same within if you change the other, the relationship would still be rotten.”

 

  • “The fact will reveal the Truth.
    There is no other way, as a human being, to move into the Truth except through the fact.
    Know the fact and you’ll enter the Truth.
    Know the fact of your daily living, know the fact of your relationships, know the fact of your mental states, and you will enter the Truth.”

 

  • “A relationship based on emotions is a relationship based on ego.”

 

  • “Love is not a relationship with the other. Love is not a behaviour displayed to others.
    Love is your internal fullness. Love is the submergence of the ego in its source.

    That closeness is called Love.

    And when that is misplaced, when that is there, then everything is alright. In Love, you may even kill. Love is sheer wisdom. And Love demands that one does kill some time. Love is not about giving each other gifts.

    “You are my darling” — that is not Love.

    And let those special days come, anniversaries and the birthdays and the valentine days and all the kuchikoo that is not Love.”

 

  • “Be cured within, then all your relationships will fall into place. Do not think that it’s about one particular person, that my relation with one man is unloving. It’s not about your relationship with one particular person, it’s about your relationship with yourself. It’s about who you are.
    If you have relationship problems, turn within, look at yourself. Do not look at that man or that relationship.

    Turn within.
    The solution lies there.”

 

  • “When so much of advice is available on how to get peace, how will one ever get peace? When so many people are intent upon telling you what to do with your life, how will you ever know what to do this moment? When you are repeatedly being told, and told, and told, about what Love means, what money means, what work is, what relationships are, what society is, what God is, how will you ever know any of these?”

 

  • “If the action is happening out of a direct relationship with the Absolute, every action is justified.”

 

  • “If your relationship is really solid, you won’t need to expect.
    You will get more than you can ever expect.”

 

  • “Healthy relationship is possible only to a healthy mind.”

 

  • “If you approach someone to heal yourself when you’re in a bad mood, then remember that it’s not that you’ll be healed, rather your relationship would be spoiled.”

 

  • “Are you afraid that turning spiritual will ruin your relationship?Then was there a relationship ever?”

 

  • “Leela is to remember whom you are wedded to.
    Leela is to not to turn an infidel.
    Leela is to not to cheat in the only Real relationship that you have.

    The only adultery is to cheat on God, because that is your only Real relationship. All other relationships can be compromised. But you are disloyal and dishonest, only if you compromise on the Truth.

    That is the only infidelity.”

 

  • “Don’t you see that life is one? Don’t you see that fundamentally your behavior and your relationship towards and with your husband and wife, is just the same, fundamentally the same, as your relationship with anything or anybody else.”

 

  • “The quarrel is always between husband and wife, never between individuals. The quarrel is always between the images. It’s the images that fight. The fact of the individual never is in quarrel or strife or contradiction.

Never.”

 

  • “Real challenge is neither the husband, nor the wife. Real challenge is one’s pettiness, one’s ego.”

 

  • “Be married to God and then let God save your marriage. Accept God as your spouse and then God will take care of your earthly, carnal spouse as well. Remember your first husband, remember your only father, and then all will be taken care of.”

 

  • “We always exist in relation to something or somebody. So, if you want to know yourself, you just see, what is the effect that the other has had upon you and we then, are a sum total of all those effects.”

 

  • “If you are not committed to the truth then thought is a perpetual wanderer. A wanderer without center. It will go to all the doors possible and keep knocking there. It will conceive all the possibilities that it has been trained to conceive, and keep considering them. You will find no stability there, you will find no rest there. There is no certainty in thought, how can you have stable relationships there?”

 

  • “When you will change, then the very basis of relationships will change.”

 

  • “The deeper is your belief in your separation, your boundaries, the more violent will be your relationship with others.”

 

  • “What is our consciousness? Consciousness is the content of mind. Consciousness is our thoughts, ideals, emotions, feelings, relationships. What is our consciousness? Our consciousness is doubt, fear, convictions, beliefs, attachments, imaginations, effort, attainment, beginning, end. That is what we call as consciousness.”

 

  • “The relationship of a healthy mind are called loving relationships.”

 

  • “Relationships, must not happen in spite of what you are. Relationships must happen, given what you are. Want an improved relationship? Be more of yourself. “

 

  • “Truth is so immediate that it does not go away even for a split second. Truth is closer to you, than anything or anybody else. That is why a man, who is not spiritual, cannot have any real relationship.”

 

  • “Keep your primary relationship strong and all other relationships will be alright. Your primary relationship is with Truth.”

 

  • “The best relationships are not born out of loneliness. A healthy relationship is born out of a sense of completion. It is not a parasitic relationship.”

 

  • “The closer somebody is to me, the more dependent I’m on that person and hence, closeness is directly proportional to the violence in relationship.”

 

  • “The deeper is your belief in your separation, your boundaries, the more violent will be your relationship with others.”

 

  • “That, in the world, which takes you to the Truth, is worth loving, is worth maintaining a relationship with and that in the world, that takes you away from the Truth, is something that you must immediately put away.”

 

  • “In the mind, everything is relative. Million relationships, is the mind. No relationships, no mind.”

 

  • “We want it to stay like eternally because eternity is our nature. It is just that we are expecting eternity in wrong places. We are expecting the body to be eternal; it wouldn’t be. We are expecting the relationships to be eternal; they wouldn’t be. We are expecting money, and family and house and everything else to be eternal and there it disappoints us.”

 

  • “The purest definition of love is, when the mind is very-very joyful then that joy shows up in all your relationships. Mind you, all your relationships! Love is your internal joy spilling over.”

 

  • “With the Truth, one can neither have a relationship of connection nor admiration. One can only surrender. You cannot appreciate the Truth. You can go ahead and appreciate some column in a magazine but to appreciate something is to still be the master; is to still be on top.”

 

  • “The quality of your mind is the quality of your relationships. The quality of your mind is the quality of your love.”

 

  • “To change your relationships, let yourself change.”

 

  • “Till the quality of my relationship with the world is the same, my quality of anger will remain the same.”

 

  • “When the person changes, his relationships too must change.”

 

  • “What deserves to come with you will come with you in love, not as relationships. As love, it will come. It cannot be dropped even if you try to drop it. So don’t be afraid, the real will anyway not go away, what does go away is not real anyway. So let it drop.”

 

  • “You know one of the reasons why people avoid even detest spirituality, it’s because they are afraid that it will lead to a total annihilation of their concepts, of their way of thinking, of their relationship, in effect, their whole life. They do not want to lose it. Because they do not want to lose it so they shy away. It is just a bid to protect oneself.”

 

  • “Real relationships don’t wait for your approval. They are. Natural. They won’t wait for your consent.”

 

  • “Relationship is not something that is pre-meditated. One is in a relationship every moment. If your central relationship with the Truth is alright, then all your other relationships that are continuously coming and going in the flow of time are automatically alright.”

 

  • “The relationship between teacher and student is not that of the giver and the taker. The relationship is of the lover and the lover. Yes, the student comes to learn a lot, but learning cannot be the purpose, it cannot be the objective and the driver. If the student goes to the teacher, the central reason is love. The central reason is not, one’s acquisitiveness for knowledge. And if you are going to a teacher in order to get something, you will probably get what you are going to get, but rest assured, very soon you will find yourself saturated and ready to leave the teacher.”

 

  • “Do you know what the other needs? That cannot be known through books. That can be known only through a loving and sensitive relationship.”

 

  • “Liberation is not something that you gain outside of yourself, outside of the relationship. Kindly, get this myth out of your head. You will not get it by breaking, by severing your bonds with the world. Yes, a little bit of solitude is necessary, but that is not the same as staying afar.”

 

  • “Our relationship with the mind is usually of two kinds, either the mind rules us or we rule the mind. Either the mind is our master or we are the masters of our mind. Both these relationships are not healthy. Neither of these is healthy. When the mind is ruling you, then for sure you are not aware of what is happening and you are just acting mechanically. When you are trying to rule the mind, then there is suppression and even that is not healthy.”

 

  • “And remember, only when you’re not afraid of others, then you can be in a healthy relationship with others.”

 

  • “Life is flexible. A real relationship is very liquid. It’s free to take all forms. It does not bind you. That’s the test of a real loving relationship. You are free to respond. You are not confined and hesitant.”

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These quotes have come from talks and writings of Acharya Prashant

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