Acharya Prashant: Is plunging into sex a method to gain freedom from sex?

Question: Acharya Ji, you have said in a previous session while discussing the attraction towards sex, that one does not need to get entangled even to overcome or suppress. One rather needs to leave sex behind. One should seek that for which one is really eager. All the energy should go in that direction.

One is not rejecting sex, one is just prioritizing correctly. One is saying that the one that has a lower priority must wait because there is something immensely more important that is higher up the priority. That which is higher up the priority is so immense that it would never get completed, never get over. So the one who is waiting for his turn, the one who is lower down the order would just keep waiting.

He would not need to be killed, he would have just been permanently postponed. And she says that, in the same session, Acharya Ji has said “In the subconscious, there is a lot that terrifies you and you try to escape that fear by not trying to know more about it. When you first enter, you will find ‘that’ will scare you but if you stay with it courageously you will meet the one that delivers you from that fear.

If a person doesn’t meet ‘that’, which scares him and how you meet the one that liberates from the fear. Therefore, on your way meet all your imperfections and impurities and it is only after that you will meet the one that purifies, perfects and completes you.

So having quoted these two excerpts from a previous session, the question is, In the context of the pull of Maya and the worldly, here relating to the pull of the sexual energy, does one acknowledge it  and transcend it by focusing on the ‘Ananth’ or God ? or does one drop the defences against Maya, go through the worldly and only then arrive at the door of the Ananth.

Thank you.

Acharya Prashant: So, two excerpts have been quoted and apparently the two excerpts are in contradiction. The first one says that you do not need to get entangled, and the second one says that you need to meet all your fears, all your impurities, all your imperfections head-on.

So the questioner is a little confused and she is asking what to do? Does one seek to cleanse herself or does one need to plunge into her own conditioning? I will repeat the question for you. In the context of the pull of Maya and the worldly, here relating to the pull of the sexual energy, does one acknowledge it and transcend it by focusing on God ? or does one drop the defenses against Maya, go through the worldly and only then arrive at the door of the Ananth?

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Look at that which really bothers you

 First, create a problem out of nothing and then solve it and feel good. Life is worthy. That is the mantra of living. Spend the first half of the day creating the problem, spend the second half of the day solving it. And do not see that this mind that wants to live in this escape is itself the biggest problem. Hide that like an assumption. Keep that buried. The real dictator is hiding and all the time creating dummies so that you can keep shooting the dummies and feel like a winner.

Look at that which really bothers you. Look at the core of your fear. Go to your innermost pain point. See what is it that makes you cry out without any apparent reason. Touch your innermost suffering. Only that can be a true relief. Not that I am greatly happy because I got 2% discount on my new sweater. Touch your innermost suffering, not surface trivia that these days I am suffering greatly because the temperature is in the range of 15 to 19 degrees. Whenever the temperature is in this range I suffer.

This is not suffering. This is an escape.

What is the problem of problems? What is the mother problem? Can we find that out? What is the soil on which all these problems germinate, can we find that out? Or, will we keep ourselves occupied with rubbish? What is the problem of problems? Let’s go ahead, what is the problem of problems? Look at that, what is the real dictator? Not the dummy ones.



Read the complete article: Mind invents dummy problems to escape looking at itself – the real problem

Mind invents dummy problems to escape looking at itself – the real problem

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Question: I fear a student who would fully surrender and dislike a student not attentive. If both the states and anything in between are only reaffirming my ego, can the session be of any use to the student?

Acharya Prashant: Who is facing this problem? Is the student asking this question?

Right now whatever he is saying is a concept of his own mind. When he says can the session be of any use to the student, the definition of use is coming from…?

Listener: Teacher.

AP: From the mind of the teacher, right? You would regard one particular thing as useful to the student and she (addressing another listener) would regard another thing as useful to the student. You might regard that if I could get the student to laugh, it indicates that the session was useful. She might regard that if I could get the students to silence, then the session was useful.

So, when we say that my session is useful to the students then what do we mean? Whatever we will mean will be an indicator of my own life. What I think of as useful for myself that I’ll think of as useful…

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This thought of success itself is sadness

Success, achievement, these thoughts come to you only when you’re feeling down. Only when you feel life has not been good to me. Only when you feel I have lost out on something, then you say I want to be successful, right? So, the thought of success itself is a very sad thought. Do you see this? The thought of success itself arises only in a sad mind. When the thought itself arises from a sad mind, how can this so-called success give you happiness? Just get rid of the sadness. Don’t chase happiness. There is no point chasing happiness, just get rid of sadness. And what is sadness? This thought of success. This thought of success itself is sadness. Get rid of it.

It arises because of an artificial sense of inadequacy that we have. Unnecessarily we have been forced to believe that this is missing, that is missing. We find it very hard to accept that life is a simple, continuous, innocent festival. It’s very difficult to accept. We have been trained to accept that life is an effort, challenge, war, accomplishment. We will become terrified if told that life is not any of these. You are not here to work hard and attain something. That is not at all why you are here.

You say then, “Why are we here, just like this?” Yes just like this. Relax, dance, enjoy. Nothing more nothing less. But even these words are giving you tension. “We will have to relax now? Where to learn that from? BRE: Bachelors in relaxation, you need a degree even for that.” You lost all touch with that which is innate.



Read the article: Do success and happiness go together?

Do success and happiness go together?

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Question: Is it necessary to be successful in order to lead a happy life?

Acharya Prashant: Let us, first of all, understand something. You are assuming that we all want happiness. That’s not a fact. You will feel little surprised, but I am insisting, we do not want happiness. All we want is freedom from sadness. Because you are sad, that is your real experience, you are sad, you want freedom from sadness. And what do you conclude? See, we live in a world of duality. If I want freedom from day, what do I get? Night. Its opposite. Are you getting it?

You want freedom from winters, what do you get? Summers. The opposite. So what do you think is, that freedom from one thing is a movement into its opposite. That’s your assumption. I am insisting that nobody in this world wants happiness. We want freedom from sadness, and we have erroneously concluded that freedom from sadness means happiness. Because we live in duality, that has been our experience.

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If you want to escape, escape Totally

Listener 1: Traditionally this idea of  ‘hankering around and everything that goes on in the mind is nonsensical’ has led to escapism. People have started saying that the pains that I experienced, the pleasures I experienced, the responsibilities, the duties that I have, are all nonsensical; neither would I go into pleasure nor would I go into pain; neither would I take up any responsibility and so on so forth.

And that is what I see with myself. When you said that all is nonsense, a kind of a nice breeze, I mean passed in my head. I can see that was not of the lightness you are talking about. That is actually of, “oh, I don’t have to do all that.”

Acharya Prashant: You have not gone deeply in your experience. Let me say something –

Escape is not at all a dirty word, if it is total escape. Total escape is liberation. 

What most of us do is that we don’t escape ‘away’, we escape ‘to’. We don’t escape away from all, we escape to something. So then you hear a teacher saying that all is nonsense then you don’t mean “all is nonsense.” Then you mean that — Okay that means my responsibilities are nonsense, my studies are nonsense, my commitments are nonsense but fun is not nonsense, sex isn’t nonsense — all that which gives me pleasure isn’t nonsense so let me escape away to that.

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Let the mind live in facts, let the mind live by faith

Question: Look at the facts of your life, then to let the mind be as it is. How?

Acharya Prashant: There is no contradiction between these two things. Looking up the facts, living in facts is simple and obvious. One lives in experiences, and every experience is a fact. So, living in fact is not something special. You are already living in facts, because you live in experiences. That’s what you call ordinary living as.

“This is just happening”, and how do you call something as happening? You call something as happening only when you register the happening. And to register it, is to experience it. So, living in facts does not mean that you have to go and explore the facts. The facts are already there and you know. And you know – you know by the virtue of experience, just honestly admit that you know the facts.

You do not feel alright in the company of a particular person, now do you really have to investigate anything here? You do not feel alright but for reasons of proprietary, or beautiful-ness, or righteousness, you do not allow yourself to acknowledge that you have not been feeling alright with this person. Even that thought is considered a taboo.

“How can I say that I dislike my religious scripture? How can I say that?”

The fact is, had you liked it, you would have read it at least once. You haven’t ever read it, read it fully, at least. Of course, your excuse is that one day you will read it. And we very well know that that day, you will ensure never comes.

To live in the facts, is to acknowledge what is going on. And when you really acknowledge what is going on, then spontaneous action happens. Now, you cannot hide. Now, you have acknowledged; you have admitted. Now, that you have admitted, you will have to act.

It is to avoid right action, and the perceived consequences of right action, that we suppress the fact.

The final arbitrator is peace – the final Judge.

If you are peaceful, then whatever you are doing is right.

It does not matter what you are doing.

And if you are not, then it doesn’t matter what you are doing, it’s hollow, fake and useless. You might be leading the most proper life, the most sanctimonious life, most disciplined, orderly and agreeable life, but if you are not peaceful, then that life is not for you – quit it. 

No means is bigger than the end. 

Peace is the beginning and the end.

One only needs to be sensitive enough to ask, “Am I alright? Am I alright?”

And usually, if you need to ask this question, then you are not. When you are really alright, this question won’t arise. If you are not alright, you don’t need to fake; say you are not, that is called faith – the ability to accept the worst of situations.

You can accept the worst of situations only when you know that you are bigger than those situations. Only when you know that those situations cannot really belittle you. You can accept the worst of so called mistakes that you might have committed, only when you know that no mistake can really stain you. No mistake is an unpardonable crime. Now you can manfully say, “Yes, of course, it’s bad. It’s bad in here.” (pointing towards the head, implying the mind) Without worrying that you are sounding like a fool, without worrying that you are not fulfilling your own expectations without worrying that your self-image is being sullied.

You know, In India, till a few decades back, many people, especially women would die rather than visit a gynecologist. They would not want to admit the fact that they have, let’s say, a sexually transmitted disease. They would keep suffering in private, but never own up the fact; such are we.

“How can I go and admit to anybody, even the doctor that I am suffering from an unspeakable disease?”

The fact is, the disease came from outside. Mostly, you have no role or responsibility in that. But yet, you have such lofty ideals — You are God’s ambassadors to bring morality to earth. How can God’s angels visit a gynecologist? (Sarcastically)

Can’t eat; can’t sit; can’t walk; can’t sleep – but won’t admit! They too, would often seek spiritual relief. It doesn’t work. (SmilesIndirect solutions are mere escapes. Few things need direct affirmations, a direct confrontation. If it displeases you or if it displeases a few other people – so be it.

Shame and guilt are the two principle drivers of our religiosity. Remove the concept of sin and see how much of this religious structure remains. Free the mind of man from the notion that he is a sinner and then see what happens to religion. Of course, nothing would happen to the Truth, but religion will crumble. And such religion must necessarily crumble. It feeds on our sense of inferiority; it feeds on our sense of guilt; it rules us by declaring us sinners.

Spirituality begins with the realization that You are beyond all sins.
You can never be a sinner – that is the beginning of spirituality.

You are already alright and perfect – without being firmly seated in this realization – how can you even begin? But if you are coming to spirituality for self-improvement or self-correction or to absolve yourself of guilt, then you are coming just from the wrong position. You are coming from a point of un-fulfilment and what comes from a point of un-fulfilment will never reach beyond un-fulfilment.

Listener 2: Sir, are you suggesting that the failure of the ego is acceptable as compared to success of the mind?

AP: How are you differentiating between the two?

L2: Ego is the body and…

AP: Ego is your sense of who you are. Mind is the whole field around that sense, around that center of who you are. Now, re-ask.

The field depends on the center, right? The mind depends on the ego; the mind is the entire universe. The universe is centered in you; you are the ego. Depending on who you are the universe keeps changing – that’s the relation between the mind and ego.

I repeat, the mind is the field of the ego. The mind is the entire expanse, of which the ego is the center, not the proper center, mind you! And hence, the mind would never be settled, unless it reaches the proper center.

With the ego as the center, the mind remains turbulent. With the Self as the center, with the Truth as the center, with peace as the center, the mind just dissolves in the center.


Excerpts from a ‘Shabd-Yoga’ session. Edited for clarity.

Watch the session: Let the mind live in facts, let the mind live by faith


Further Reading:

Fear

fear-book-cover-copy

A journey towards understanding every aspect of fear, toward finding whether fear is biological or social, or both, this book provides its readers the ultimate antidote for fear in the form of Faith. What is faith? How is it different from superstition and belief? Is faith sufficient to fight fear?

Acharya Prashant, the author, elucidates questions like these in the simplest possible way, ushering the reader into the fearless zone which mankind has been seeking since millennia.

Paperback: https://goo.gl/p4g90y

Kindle: https://goo.gl/zbGTcs