Anger is often just an impotent and deceptive escape

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Anger

You have heard that it was said to those of old, “You shall not murder, and whoever murders will be in danger of the judgment.’ But I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment. And whoever says to his brother, “Raca!’ shall be in danger of the council. But whoever says, “You fool!’ shall be in danger of hell fire. Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First, be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. Agree with your adversary quickly, while you are on the way with him, lest your adversary deliver you to the judge, the judge hand you over to the officer, and you be thrown into prison.
Assuredly, I say to you, you will by no means get out of there till you have paid the last penny.

~Jesus, Sermon on the Mount Continue reading

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How do I know whether I really understand it?

Question: Sir, how do I know whether I am really understanding something or not?

Shri Prashant: Understanding is not some knowledge that you can hold and store here (pointing towards the brain).

 It has to become your life. If it is not becoming your life, it is useless.

You may know a lot about fearlessness.

“You know, I have read twenty volumes on fearlessness. And the moment I see a small lizard, all hell breaks loose!” Continue reading

The power of desire is the power you are using to suppress it

Questioner: My question is about anger. A few days back I got angry over the behaviour of another woman on the road and bashed out on her, without thinking anything. I then got this feeling that it should not have been done. I don’t know what I was doing. Inside I was feeling like, “How could I do that?” At the same time what was happening was intolerable.

Speaker: If it was really not tolerable, why do you blame yourself for getting angry?

Listener: No, I am not blaming the anger but this doesn’t usually happen.

Speaker: Why is the incident still sitting in your mind? Surely there is guilt. Surely you are blaming yourself. Do you remember everything that has happened over the last five days? Then why do you remember this one in particular? Because you do not like that you got angry. It violates the image that your teachers and parents and all the nice books provided you. “The nice lady does not get angry”. Why does the nice lady not get angry?

Everything has its place in existence. Why must you not get angry? Why?

Continue reading

Why can’t I stop cheating myself?

Questioner: Sir, I know somewhere I am cheating myself but I am still doing, what I am doing. Why?

Speaker: (Jokingly) You want to get beaten up, that’s it, nothing else.

(everyone laughs)

Mind has several diseases out of which one is this one as well. There are people who take pleasure in getting beaten up. Have you heard of such people?

(Jokingly) You want to get beaten up and there is immense pleasure in getting spanked. There are tools available in the market. Some people do not even get sexually aroused unless you beat them black, blue and red.

(everyone laughs)

That is it. According to his conditioning, one demands pleasure out of various things in life. There is nothing in existence which is not a source of pleasure to somebody or the other.

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How to deal with anger?

Questioner: In spite of keeping all watch and vigil, anger comes and leads to wrong actions on certain trigger points and situations. After that it is realized that a slip happened. What is the way?

Speaker: There is nothing in existence that is unnecessary, totally useless, needlessly there. It is good that we are talking of anger, its causes and its consequences, the harm that it does. But that also might be because firstly anger is very gross, very visible. There is a clear sensual expression of anger. So, it becomes very obvious that we are angry; it cannot remain hidden. And secondly our education or morality has constantly taught us that anger is something bad. So to the problem of anger, we seem like being alert. But are we equally alert, let’s say, to the fact that even in those moments of the day when everything appears normal, we are actually feeling a little down, a little dull, a little bored, a little short of energy; that we do not consider a problem as big as anger, again for those two same reason. One, anger is gross and that constant sense of background boredom is subtle. In anger you shout, your face turns red, your blood pressure rises. In boredom, well, there is not much that happens that can be caught or traced by senses. Now you are just sitting, you are weary, you are yawning, and it doesn’t seem that there is much wrong with yawning. In anger, well you are beating people up. It seems that there is so much wrong with anger. And secondly, we have been taught that anger is bad and boredom is a much smaller evil. But is that so?

Continue reading

How do I get rid of my restlessness?

Question: Restlessness doesn’t really leave me. Why am I so restless? How can I get rid of my restlessness?

Speaker: Cars these days come with the auto-pilot feature. You can put the car on the cruise mode, especially on long drives, and the driver can relax. There was a research conducted on the vehicles that have this auto-drive feature.  It was found out that people who buy cars having this facility do not really use it. Continue reading

Happiness cannot be the purpose of life

Question: Sir, what is the purpose of life?  Is it earning money, or happiness?

Speaker: The lady is asking, ‘What is the ultimate purpose of life?’ She has already presented us two options:

  1. Earning money or,
  1. Happiness.

But you already know. You have already discounted everything else and zeroed in on to two options. What are they? That the purpose could be either to earn money, or to be happy.

Alright. So let’s first look at these two. What does one earn money for?

Listener 1: For livelihood.

Speaker: And, why does one want a livelihood?

Listener 2: For comfort.

Speaker: What does comfort give you?

Listener 3: Satisfaction and happiness. Continue reading